


My Wildest Dreams

by lucybeee



Series: Kyoru Week 2020 [2]
Category: Fruits Basket, Fruits Basket (Anime 2019), Fruits Basket - Takaya Natsuki (Manga)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dreams and Nightmares, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Spoilers, Tohru is actually really traumatized ok?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:14:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26872003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucybeee/pseuds/lucybeee
Summary: He wasn't what she'd pictured when she was younger, but...(Kyoru Week 2020 day 2: Dream)Major manga spoilers!
Relationships: Honda Tohru/Sohma Kyou
Series: Kyoru Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1958836
Comments: 4
Kudos: 49





	My Wildest Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> I've noticed that finding related music has helped me keep up with these two challenges thus far, so you're likely going to get a song verse at the beginning of each chapter. 
> 
> Song: "Wildest Dreams" by Ron Pope
> 
> ***WARNING: major, MAJOR manga spoilers. Read at your own risk!***

" _I've been waiting all my life_

_for some reason that I never could describe._

_You're not quite what I pictured you would be;_

_you're better than my wildest dreams."_

* * *

According to her grandfather, when Tohru was little, she told everyone she wanted to be a veterinarian when she grew up. She wanted to save lots of animals, particularly cats. She dreamed of marrying a Prince Charming and having a house full of kids. She said her mom would be the best grandmother.

As she grew, those dreams shrank.

When she was old enough to truly understand the impact her father's death had had on the household finances, she quickly realized that college would not be an option. She and her mother were comfortable enough, but guilt ate away at Tohru whenever she thought about how hard Kyoko worked to keep them afloat. So she decided she would start working right after high school graduation, and take care of her mom for a change. Marriage and kids someday would be nice, yes, but they weren't a priority like they seemed to be when she was a little girl daydreaming about the future.

Then her mom died.

The dream of working hard after high school, buying her mom a nice house and taking care of her for the rest of her life crumbled away.

And she was left with nothing.

Not only did Tohru have no particular dreams or goals for the future anymore, but she also realized she had no sense of identity. She had lived her entire life up to that point doing whatever she thought would make her mother happy. Whatever would keep her mom alive in the years following her father's death.

She started to question everything.

Was she actually extremely polite? Or was it just because she'd adopted her father's personality in a desperate attempt to keep some part of him alive? How would she talk if she _hadn't_ done that in the first place?

Was her favorite color actually pink? Or did she just say that because her mother used to say that "pink was for Tohru"?

Did she still actually want to work right after high school?

Did she actually want to even keep going to high school at all?

Did she actually want to keep _living_?

And then there was him.

Kyo didn't change everything overnight, of course. He wasn't capable of something like that. He wasn't a superhero. Really, he wasn't even a Prince Charming, exactly (though he was incredibly attractive, it was hard to refer to him as a prince when he had been screaming at her constantly in the months following their first meeting).

But something about him felt like home. When he was around, something inside her started to thaw. She figured out eventually that it was her heart. He made her feel again.

At some point, she started seeking him out when she entered a crowded room. She started getting goosebumps whenever he said her name. An indescribable fire was lit within her belly whenever he touched her or got near her. Thoughts that he was "conventionally attractive" changed to an almost-obsession; she loved everything about him. His rough hands, his broad and toned shoulders, his sharp jawline and the slight orange stubble that would sit on it when he hadn't shaved for a couple days. And God forbid he ever walked around the house without a shirt on.

It was terrifying. Absolutely, positively horrifying.

So, naturally, Tohru tried to deny it.

She didn't love him. She couldn't.

But she did. She knew that.

So she pushed the blame off on her mother. Falling in love with Kyo, with _anyone_ would mean taking attention from her mother. It simply wasn't worth it. It would be a dishonor to her mom's memory. That excuse worked for a while.

But one day, Shigure had asked her a peculiar question. It was only a few words. He never even finished it.

" _Do you want to save Kyo? Do you love…?"_

The feeling that washed over her in that moment was devastating. A sense of realization had never hit her so hard before. Yes, she did want to save Kyo. Yes, she _did_ love Kyo. There was nothing she could do about it. There was no way to deny it anymore--if other people were noticing, she was doing a lousy job hiding it, anyway, and was clearly in too deep.

She knew, then, that she needed to tell him. It was a burning desire, one that was so intense it left her knees weak and with stars in her vision when Kyo had approached her later that day.

Brave. She needed to be brave.

But she couldn't. The words sat on her tongue, heavy and made bitter by her fear of rejection, her fear of losing him.

So she stayed quiet. Staying quiet was always the safer option.

Nothing gained, but nothing _lost_ , either.

She'd stayed quiet until that night in the rain, when he confessed. When he told her he fell in love with her by accident, that he was there when her mom passed, that he wished _he_ had died that day instead of Kyoko.

That was when she finally let her words pour out. Her voice was wobbly, almost drowned out by the thrum of the rain on the ground. But she said it. She said everything she had been bottling up.

She _loved_ him. She wanted to be with him.

And then he left.

* * *

Tohru gasped for air, springing up in bed.

Dream. It was just a dream.

But that realization didn't stop her palms from sweating or her entire body from trembling in distress.

She ran her fingers over the bandages she still wore from the hospital. Even though those disjointed thoughts had only been a dream...just hours ago, she hadn't known whether or not Kyo really loved her in return. Just hours ago, that dream had been her reality.

Tohru drew her legs up to her chest, resting her forehead on her knees. She took deep breaths in an attempt to calm her heartbeat. But after a moment, she felt her shoulders tremble, and she released her breath in a sob. She hugged her legs tightly, mentally scolding herself for being so childish, so _weak_.

It was just a dream.

Before she really even knew what was happening, her feet were carrying her out of her room and down the hall. Her knuckles were rapping against his door.

"Tohru?" he whispered once he saw her. "It's late. Wait, wh-what's wrong?!"

Tohru rubbed at her damp cheeks, desperately trying to pull herself together as she whimpered. Kyo glanced nervously toward Yuki's door before pulling her into his room. There, she sobbed and cried freely. She couldn't help it. She _needed_ him.

He held her. He stroked her hair, pressed kisses to her temples. He didn't even know what was wrong, but he let her cling to him anyway.

Once she'd settled down, she nuzzled her face against his chest and stammered, voice hoarse, "I dreamt...you were...you _left_ again."

She felt him tense for a moment before sighing and tightening his grip on her.

"I'm sorry," he whispered back.

"Promise me…please..." she trailed off, a fresh sob hitching in her throat. He knew what she meant.

"Never again. I promise, Tohru. Never."

She nodded, her anxiety quelled a bit by his response.

"Come lie with me," Kyo told her, tugging her hand until they were positioned on his futon, facing each other. He played with her hair as she started to doze off.

No, he hadn't started out as a Prince Charming. He'd started out crude and harsh. Somewhere along the line, that deceptive anger had turned into endless affection for her. Soft touches and glances, kind words. And now, tight cuddles and languid kisses.

He was her knight in shining armor now. He was kind, smart, handsome, and so very in love with her. He was her biggest supporter, the person she could run to when she was scared. He was her best friend, the love of her life.

He was everything.

He was better than anything she could have dreamt up.

**Author's Note:**

> Furuba socials: riceballcatfb on Instagram, Tumblr, and Twitter


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